To Live In The Present..?

Last night, a friend told me that I was too young to want what I want; that I'll have to wait in the test of the world and gain some more years before others around me want the same things I want.

"You want something mature and stable, long-lasting, don't you?"

I said yep, pretty much. He said that it will never happen because I'm only 19 and once I'm older, that's when people would take me seriously.

But not only myself, but my sister as well: we've beaten those odds. We both finished high school at age 17. My sister moved out soon after that, and I moved out when I was 18. I got my own place when I was 19. We both got and paid for our own cars (with some family loans, but we're paying them back each month. My sister found a guy that became not only her best friend, but they have a future planned out.

Now I don't necessarily want to scare anyone away by planning a future out--those things come over time.
But to be 19, emotionally 19, but mentally 30,.....my mind is supposed to wait some odd amount of years until I no longer have to question how long the relationships I am in will last?
Bullshit.
I know people my age that have people and it seems they're in it for the long-haul. Maybe they are, and maybe they aren't. But they're trying. They are both in their relationship thinking that this is who they want, this is who they love, this is who they always want to be around.
They don't think that this is an "only-for-right-now" person or an "until I leave" person or "this will never last but it's fun until I decide to stop responding."

I truly don't understand people.
And for a little while, I thought maybe it was location. But then, I've moved so often that, I soon came to the realization that running away for only that reason was dumb.

I want to get married and have kids SOMEDAY, but I certainly do not want those things Right Now. Especially since no one's proven that I can even trust them in the present.



To live in the present. Fine. Yes. This is true, it is a wonderful idea to follow.

🍻Cheers to living, and living happily, by yourself.

13:54.

Ps, I went to sleep around 3-3:30 last night...and I just recently woke up. Gooooooood days. 😊